Espresso Energy Balls

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Hiii. Due to the overwhelming (luke-warm) response on my Instagram page, I decided to make this my next post. You know when you’re at work and you just need a little snacky-poo? This is the snacky-poo you need. Creamy almond butter, rolled oats and ground flaxseed mixed with freshly ground espresso and chocolate chips, then rolled into bite-size balls that you can eat quickly and suspiciously because you’re not really supposed to be eating at work. And then somebody says, “What’s that?”

“It’s an energy ball!”

“What’s an energy ball?” 

“It’s like a, like, rolled oats and almond butter, and some chocolate, there’s some energy in there. It’s balls-it’s a ball. It tastes good. …..I have energy now!”

You too can have the energy, if you make these balls.

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Banana Bread Muffins


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IT’S ANOTHER MOM ORIGINAL. The most delectable, moist, and loving banana bread recipe you’ll ever use. It’s the type of muffin you use to break bread with your enemies, or whatever.

My mom is kind of pissed that I didn’t pack these with walnuts (like she did), but chocolate chips always take priority in my recipes. Also, she loves raisins. So she’s a little sweetie but I know that I can’t always trust her because one day she might just snap and sprinkle raisins into everything.

Banana bread muffins. But wait, isn’t that a little redundant? Couldn’t you just call them banana muffins? No. Because you should never forget that you have choices in this recipe. Bread or muffins. I am pro-choice.

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Mom’s Cookies

IMG_5700-2I was lucky growing up to have a mom that baked. We never had store-bought cookies in our lunch – something I whined about as a kid. But I now appreciate what my mom was trying to do. She taught me the difference between pre-made and homemade. She kept me from becoming someone whose recipes include ingredients like “1 box Bisquick” or “instant brownie mix”. (If you’re reading this and feeling offended because you use instant shit, come see me. You can still be saved.) Thanks, mom.

She used to make these cookies all the time when I was a kid. Everyone loved them (obviously) and I am going to share them with you because I’m mama’s little sweetie and I would never deprive you.

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Maple Pecan Scones

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L
ittle doogie (that’s me) figured out how to make a light box this weekend, thanks to this tutorial. That’s right. My photography is about to get a little less embarrassing and a little more delicious.

This is another favorite from my cookbook by the Pioneer Woman. The scones are crumbly, tender, light and on their own not overly sweet. But they’ve been dancing in a maple-flavoured rain, and they gotsta warm up with a cup o’ tea.

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Dark Chocolate Coconut Protein Bars

 

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I just wanna say that I really wrestled with the title for this recipe. I think I took the mature route by calling these what they are, but I wanted to call them what they look like. Protein turds. What is more catchy than that? I’m serious. You’re not going to forget a recipe with the word “turd” in it. You’re just not. And once you try them you will think “God that turd was good. Give me another turd.”

It’s just good to be original.

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Chocolate Caramel (Millionaire) Bars

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Went to the store and picked up this little guy. Good tip: looking for an easy recipe? Check out the website of the brand you just bought. Some of my best recipes are courtesy of Hershey. These bars are most commonly known as “Millionaire Shortbread” but I refer to them as “crack bars” or “homemade Twix”, or “YOU’VE ALREADY HAD LIKE TEN DON’T TOUCH THOSE”.

Let’s just dive right in you guys! I can’t wait. This is going to be the best recipe of our lives.

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