God bless The Beagle Pub. It was the very first pub I went to on my 19th birthday in Victoria, where I had lunch with three policemen. I had been arrested earlier that morning for farting on a baby, but the charges were later dropped when the baby correctly identified Kristen Wiig next to me in a lineup.
Hiii. Due to the overwhelming (luke-warm) response on my Instagram page, I decided to make this my next post. You know when you’re at work and you just need a little snacky-poo? This is the snacky-poo you need. Creamy almond butter, rolled oats and ground flaxseed mixed with freshly ground espresso and chocolate chips, then rolled into bite-size balls that you can eat quickly and suspiciously because you’re not really supposed to be eating at work. And then somebody says, “What’s that?”
“It’s an energy ball!”
“What’s an energy ball?”
“It’s like a, like, rolled oats and almond butter, and some chocolate, there’s some energy in there. It’s balls-it’s a ball. It tastes good. …..I have energy now!”
You too can have the energy, if you make these balls.
Hi friends. I’ve been away for a while. But I’m here now. Did you know that natural sunlight is pretty imperative to food photography if you have no artificial lighting? Yeah. It is important. I’ve just been taking awful photo after awful photo. But then I woke up one morning and it was like Beyonce was standing in the doorway: there was an overwhelming burst of sunshine, my hair blew back, and I knew everything was going to be OK. I whipped up my usual Bacon, Egg & Avocado Bagel and I snapped these pictures for you. This recipe is fucking delicious.
I wake up like this.
This recipe is Flawless.
It was the Best Thing I Ever Had.
OK OK I’m done.
Hello my babies.
It’s raining here in Victoria and when I think of rain, I inevitably think of soup. (Obviously, what a cliche train of thought…This girl is so boring.) When I was growing up, my mom would make soup or stew on rainy days, and I would cry. It seems kind of dramatic, but soup just isn’t my style. The only thing that made me cry faster than soup was being dragged along to Fabricland with my mom. A stranger’s van is more kid-friendly than Fabricland. (Sorry, mom. Love you.) Anyway, let’s get back to this bangin’ SOUP.
Usually for lunch at work I’ll have a granola bar, a banana, a sandwich with some kind of sugar-packed spread. I sit there in the lunch room with my feet propped up, viciously gnawing off a piece of the granola bar into my mouth (rock hard from the cold weather). I look down at the crumbs on my shirt and nod. My hair is frizzy, my eyeliner is smeared. I am an idiot.
But with my new lunch, I am Cool Girl.