Starbucks Oat Fudge Bars

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I made a post on Instagram recently that gained a bit of curious attention. I posted about going for a run and enjoying it. Now, most people who know me are aware of my true apathy toward sports. I understand that the idea of me going for a run seems surprising, but I would like to dispel the notion that I am completely unable to be athletic. I have actually made three athletic achievements in my lifetime. And two were for running, you bitches. Read on.

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Caramel Apple Spiced Cider

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Are you spending all of your money at Starbucks? Have you been reduced to rags, desperately chewing on old, used cellophane for sustenance? Well, if the drink you’re addicted to is the Caramel Apple Spice, I can help you make it at home.

Because the only thing keeping us all from true happiness is more sugar.

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Raspberry Cheesecake Parfaits (For Two)

IMG_0606_Paula Deen is a lot of things: racist, Southern, butter… But damnit, she makes great dessert. And if you like cheesecake (like me), but are too lazy to make it (like me), then these parfaits are the answer. You get the rich and creamy texture of a cheesecake with that tangy and sweet raspberry, but don’t have to bullshit with slicing anything. So no one can point at you and say “HAY SHE HAD THREE PIECES!!!” You’ll say, “No, I had one huge jar. Now shut up and eat your kale chips.”

The best part about this dessert is that it’s red and white, so you can make it for Canada Day and pass it off as patriotic! YAAAY!

The worst part about it is nothing. There is no bad part about it.

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Throwback

Here’s me at the Moss Street Market in Victoria, years before I moved here. (I think I was about fifteen?)

I still have that ring! And no I haven’t changed from this picture–I still put things up my nose.

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Food Throwback

Here’s a picture of my first meal at John’s Place here in Victoria back in 2013.

I ordered the Belgian waffle with cream cheese syrup. Their cream cheese syrup is fucked, and when I say fucked, I mean it’s very good. They were even on The Food Network’s You Gotta Eat Here (they appear around 8:45)!

Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day. I LOVE going out for breakfast, and every single server I’ve met at John’s has been like a fun aunt who says yes to everything.

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Everything Pasta

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You know when you were a kid and you’d make “soup” in the backyard, which basically consisted of grass and weeds and shit in a bucket of water? You were just throwing everything in there, whatever you wanted. And you were probably hanging out with your imaginary friend Shadow because I guess your real friends were busy again (because you did have friends, for the record). This pasta is sort of like that soup. Made with fresh tomatoes, the homemade sauce will happily welcome your favorite veggies or meat. You can throw whatever you want in there… and hopefully have more than a Shadow to eat it with.

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